Close Menu
Call now

Contact us

Contact Us

How to Encourage Elder Family Members to Meet With a Trusted Estate Planning Advisor

Posted on August 15th, 2022

Our Mooresville attorneys at Daly Mills Estate Planning know what a tough scenario it can be to have an aging loved one who refuses to talk about what happens to their property when they are no longer here to make their own decisions.

We have talked before about how parents can discuss their end-of-life care and final wishes with their adult children, but sometimes the shoe is on the other foot, and it is the adult(s) who does not want to have the conversation.

The reality is, an elderly family member may not want to discuss their affairs with anyone in the family, for fear of the unknown, or the idea that someone might take what is theirs before they are gone.

Here are a few tips to get your aging parents, relatives, or even friends to discuss their plans, even if they do not want to discuss them with you (or another family member). Our Iredell County estate planning professionals are happy to take the lead, so the conversation is certain to remain confidential.

Look To Your Elder’s Trusted Inner Circle for Help

If the person in question believes it is no one’s business what his or her estate plans are — therefore just choose not to make any — look toward their inner circle for help in convincing them otherwise.

It is important to not push, or become angry, but to provide a compassionate approach to changing their minds. Sometimes, this conversation is best handled by a sibling, trusted friend, or an existing professional — like an accountant or banker — who is of similar age and has gone through the process themselves.

Another good idea is to have them go through the process with you or a trusted friend who also does not have a plan in place. Although all estate plans will differ based on the individual’s unique needs, riding to meet with a North Carolina estate planner together can help ease their anxiety and provide the comfort level they need to produce results.

At Daly Mills Estate Planning, our Lake Norman area attorneys have worked with reluctant clients before and are happy to put them at ease and explore their concerns, so they feel in control of the process from start to finish.

Explain the Alternative to Having an Estate Plan in Place

It is never a good idea to talk about estate planning with a heavy or threatening hand.

When positioning the conversation, talk about what is important to them:

  • Are there grandchildren who they would like to help put through school?
  • Is there an organization or not-for-profit they would like to support?
  • Would they like to donate to their alma mater after death?
  • Do they have health problems that need to be financially addressed?
  • Have they gotten divorced, or lost their spouse, and have yet to update their Powers of Attorney?
  • What will motivate them to pursue, at the very least, a conversation with a trusted professional?

Remember, developing an estate plan is important, no matter your age or wealth. However, as we begin to age, we can become more stubborn and set in our ways. A gentle approach will always be more successful than an overwhelming or stern conversation.

Explain how part of the estate plan includes planning for medical decisions and other important details while the person is living, and that the process is about more than distributing their assets once they are gone.

We can help, starting with a free consultation today.

Contact Our Skilled Estate Planning Attorneys in Mooresville, North Carolina Today

To learn more about how we can help you establish an estate plan for you or your loved one that fits your needs, call us at (704) 286-8437 to schedule an initial consultation with our estate planning attorneys in Mooresville, North Carolina today.